Creating funny messages through joke airport announcements and fake terrorist alerts

Funny Airport Announcements

I received this via a MS Word file. Airport announcers were tricked into making these announcements under the pretence that they were foreign names. Here is the story ...

"We‘d go and sit on the balcony at Terminal 3 at Heathrow, directly under one of the speakers as the roof is low.

We put the tape machine in our bag with the microphone poking out of the top. We‘d look for a flight that had arrived in the last 40 minutes from somewhere where you‘d expect mental names, then write a letter saying, 'Could you go and pick up etc. etc. from flight, etc.'

That way, it looked like it‘d been arranged in advance as the flight arrival details were written on the note.

We also wore an ID-style badge and carried a mobile so that we looked like taxi drivers.

One of us would get the first one read out and then the other did the second.

We‘d pretend to be unable to pronounce it and then hand them the bit of paper with the name written on it. Long winded, but well worth it!

"We got rumbled doing the 'My colleague just, etc.' They actually threatened to arrest us as apparently they‘d actually had complaints over the previous weeks!

We were toying with doing it again just to see what they‘d arrest us for, but we rang Chris and all he said was, 'Go to Gatwick!'

This is the reason the last one sounds so crap ‘cos Gatwick is a much noisier place and the ceilings are high, and it was difficult to get near a speaker. The lengths we had to go to ...."

Looks Like… Reads Like… Sounds Like…
Arheddis Varkenjaab and Aywellbe Fayed I hate this fucking job, and I will be fired

Arhev Bin Fayed and Bybeiev Rhibodie I have been fired, and bye-bye everybody

Aynayda Pizaqvick and Malexa Kriest I need a piss quick, and my legs are crossed

Awul Dasfilshabeda and Nowaynayda Zheet Aa-ooh, that feels better, and now I need a shit

Makollig Jezvahted and Levdaroum DeBahzted My colleague just farted, and left the room, the bastard

Steelaygot Maowenbach and Tuka Piziniztee Still, I got my own back and took a piss in his tea

Australian state television has aired the footage of two pranksters who were able to get boarding calls for what appeared to be "Al Qaeda" and "Mr Terrorist" announced over the public address system at Sydney airport.

They were slammed for having a "childish sense of humor" in the current security crisis by the airline they targeted.

Producers of Australian Broadcasting's (ABC) The Chaser's War on Everything satirical programme booked two tickets on a Wednesday flight to Melbourne with low-cost carrier Virgin Blue. The tickets were in the names of "Al Kyder" and "Mr Terry Wrist," New South Wales daily Sydney Morning Herald is reporting.

Fellow travelers at Sydney's Kingsford Smith airport were reportedly alarmed at the names being called, with some assuming it was a coded call to security staff of an incident unfolding.


Al Kyder and Terry Wrist,